Reflections

I never totally understood all of the hype about ringing in the New Year; until recently that is. I used to think it was just everyone’s excuse to go party, which for many people it still is, but it is so much more for everyone else. It’s a time of reflection of the highs and lows that each person has endured for the past year.

I have always been firm believer that you should always be moving forward in every area of your life. Moving forward doesn’t have to necessarily be some major life change but just something that shows you are different and at a different point in your life than what you were a year ago. 

In many areas I have taken steps forward. In school I’m finally finished with AACC and have my associates and will begin my bachelors degree at UMBC. At work I was just starting part time and this month I just went full time. In ministry I went with a group of other churchgoers to start a brand new congregation in an area that we have never been to before. 

I look at that as me moving forward. Taking steps to better myself and my future. Then when I look at my health I see regression. I’m literally back where I was in August of 2014, almost 3 years ago. That’s definitely not what I had planned. 

I was supposed to get the transplant and be done with it for good. That’s obviously not what God had planned. What’s the most interesting about it all is that I am now closer in my walk and relationship with God than I have ever been. You don’t have peace that it will all be alright just by crossing your fingers and hoping that God will start accepting bribes. You get the peace that I have from the Heavenly Father and no one else. 

While I’m excited about my new place in God and where He is taking me I must admit I’m frustrated. I’m frustrated that I had to go back in order to go forward. But even in that frustration I’m thankful. I’m thankful that God has given me the understanding that He hasn’t just reverted me back to where I started to leave me there. 

Since I have had to basically start this journey all over again I have learned several new lessons and had many new experiences. As with every trial I have had my ups and downs but that failed to stop me in 2016. Although 2017 will surely have its own highs and lows I’m fully believing that with this whole kidney adventure I’m moving forward!